Could i have an honest opinion of this educational/sci-fi short story?
dannie squeezed the small hand. “calm down, quinn.” she hissed, the wooden planks trembling below her feet. the boy paused, then continued to jump. “do you want to get off? ” she asked ominously. “nooo! ” he exclaimed, planting his feet on the floor. “i stopped, see? ”
“good.”
“i stopped.”
“shhh. i think it’s going to start.”
“welcome! ” a woman’s voice sounded from behind them. they turned to see a woman dressed in a brilliant, wine-red trench coat with well-polished, intricate gold buttons. a flamboyant black tricorn hat with a wide white plume rested on beautiful black hair which ran in great waves over her shoulders. she gestured towards the ceiling. “shall we begin? ” quinn nodded eagerly, a ridiculously wide smile stretching over his face. the woman answered with a smile and raised her foot. as her foot fell to the floor with a resounding crack, the wooden platform below them began to rise. wind rushed against their faces, the darkness clearing as they ascended from beneath the ship’s deck into open air. great masts surged into sight until the platform slowed and stopped at the peak of the mainmast. they were standing in the crow’s nest.

dannie held her breath. the woman raised her warm, caramel-colored eyes. “my name is annie, captain of this ship. i’ll be leading you through a thrilling journey at this moment in time.” around them, the darkness had erupted into color and starlight, exquisite wonders stretching far into the distances. quinn had become shocked into silence, but his eyes shined as brightly as the surrounding celestials.

the captain waved to the starboard side. “to your right, you may observe the sun. the gaseous star is 8 light-minutes away from our planet earth and provides us with light and heat.” as she finished, a large burst of flame ruptured from the surface, flinging flames high into the darkness. “solar flare? ” dannie asked as she wonderosly watched the traces of flame dissipate into space. “correct.” the captain answered. “however, they are scarcely ever directed at earth, and even in the situation that one does hit earth, our magnetic fields would protect us. have you ever wondered about the northern lights? those are electrically charged particles from the sun colliding with the atmosphere. i’m sure that it would be quite a spectacle.”

the ship suddenly heaved into movement, sailing through the dark space. “our solar system…” captain started, tugging at her hat. “exists in a spiral galaxy called the milky way.” quinn pulled at his sister’s sleeve. “milky way? ” he whispered. “it’s really, really big.” dannie explained, uselessly demonstrating with her hands. “it has billions of stars. the sun is one of those stars.”
“how many zeros do billions have? ”
“nine. nine zeroes.”
“but today, our trip will go beyond our territory.” interrupted the captain with a hint of annoyance. “we will be visiting the most luminous galaxy known to mankind.”
the ship began to quiver, power emanating throughout the structure. a sudden brightness overtook dannie’s vision, forcing her to close her eyes.