Edit for Word Choice PRACTICE 5 Editing paragraphs for word choice
Find and edit six examples of vague or abstract language, slang, wordy
language, or clichés in the following paragraphs.
(1) Imagine spending almost two weeks living in the coolest home in the
world. (2) That is what scientist Lloyd Godson did when he lived at the bottom
of a lake in Australia for thirteen days. (3) Although there is no way on earth 1
would want to do that, it sure sounds fascinating.
(4) Godson's home was an 8-by-11-foot-long yellow steel box that he
dubbed the BIOSUB. (5) His air supply came from the algae plants growing
inside the BioSUB. (6) Divers brought him food, water, and other junk through
a manhole built in the bottom of his underwater home. (7) To keep busy, he
rade on an exercise bicycle, which created electricity for him to recharge his
laptop and run the lights for his plants. (8) He used his computer to talk to
students all over the world and to watch movies.
(9) Godson paid for this experiment with money he had won in the
"Live Your Dream" contest. (10) At this point in time, I have to say that for
most people, the BIOSUB home would be less appealing than a regular,
aboveground room, apartment, or house. (11) Indeed, by the time his two
weeks were over, Godson was ready to come up, feel the sunshine and wind
on his face again, and "smell the roses."

(1) in the coolest home in the world.

(3). there is no way on earth I would want to do that.

(7) created electricity for him to recharge his

laptop.

(8) all over the world

(10) At this point in time

(11) "smell the roses."

Explanation:

Editing is described as the process of altering the text of a document or written piece in order to make it more precise, clear, and coherent.

In the given paragraphs, the six errors related to word-choice, abstract language, wordiness, or clichés are as mentioned above. In the first sentence, the word 'coolest' exemplifies a slang while 'there is no way on earth I would want to do that' reflects the use of 'abstract language.' In sentence 7 and 8, the words 'created', 'recharge', and 'all over' demonstrates the wrong word-choice. The sentence 10 displays wordiness in the use of phrase 'at this point in time' and the last sentence in the use of 'smell the roses' reflect 'cliche.'

1. read the following excerpt from franklin d. roosevelt's "fireside chat 19":

on the other side of the picture, we must learn also to know that guerilla warfare against the germans in, let us say serbia or norway, us; that a successful russian offensive against the germans us; and that british successes on land or sea in any part of the world strengthen our hands.

remember always that germany and italy, regardless of any formal declaration of war, consider themselves at war with the united states at this moment just as much as they consider themselves at war with britain or russia. and germany puts all the other republics of the americas into the same category of enemies. the people of our sister republics of this hemisphere can be honored by that fact.  

the true goal we seek is far above and beyond the ugly field of battle. when we resort to force, as now we must, we are determined that this force shall be directed toward ultimate good as well as against immediate evil. we americans are not destroyers — we are builders.

analyze the effectiveness of this excerpt. how does it function within the speech as a whole? how does the structure of the excerpt to convey the speech's purpose and key points? support your argument with evidence from the speech. (10 points)

the complete subject is

lorna