Which have a greater impact on shaping our identity good or bad memories

It would depend on the person.

Explanation:

I have some major ptsd from the way I grew up. Even though I am currently in the process of figuring out who I outside of other people's wants, I find that some of the things that I want to do with my life I cannot yet because there are still so many negative experiences(aka memories) holding me back due to me not being strong enough to deal with the issues for so many years.

I've been out of my...situation, for almost four years now and have had many good experiences since then, but they seem to be simply a small break from trying to fix myself. At the end of the day, when I stare sleeplessly up at the ceiling, I know that the negative will always be there tugging at my mind, telling me that it would be easier to just regress back to all the negativities.

the answer is something i don't know

yes it is like you know me bro