1 I ain't no valedictorian. I'll give you that. But I'm certainly not the loser my step-father Johnnie likes to think I am, either. Mr. oh-so-famous local Johnnie Pipehead of "Johnnie on the Spot Plumbing." (Real clever name, huh?) Just because he only took the requisite twelve years to make it through school and graduate from his alma mater, and I took slightly longer, that doesn't make me a loser. So what if I took "the road less traveled by" and added a one-year, scenic detour to my journey--thanks to Algebra, Physical Science, and well...Latin. Did I mention Chemistry? Let's just say I liked Latin but Latin didn't much care for me. Just because I took thirteen years in all to get out of Melancholy High with a diploma doesn't make me some loser. Being nothing at all, now THAT would make me a loser. 2 I am something. But what I am, and what I'll be, are two countries at war at present. Battles, I've had them. Many battles. Literal ones...figurative ones...too many. Figurative language...see there? At least I did learn a few somethings in Mr. J's English class.

3 I could've been the valedictorian. Of somewhere. Of some school that had a bunch of unmotivated kids like me. Then, maybe I would have gone to those Physical Science study halls. Maybe I would have actually done my homework in Mr. Pugnacious' class. Real name, Pugliese. Wrestling coach. Don't you just love that moniker? For a wrestling coach...Pugnacious. Funny stuff, huh? Made that up. It stuck. Guy's got a bulldog face but a little tail-wagging personality. Had everything but the panting. And the drool. Too much caffeine I suppose. Too happy. Loved his math, that Pugnacious.
The author creates a humorous tone through the use of

A) formal language.
B) informal language.
C) parallel structure.
D) chronological order.

Select the correct text in the passage. which sentence in this excerpt from abraham lincoln's second inaugural address conveys that he wanted the us civil war to end as soon as possible? neither party expected for the war the magnitude or the duration which it has already attained. neither anticipated that the cause of the conflict might cease with or even before the conflict itself should cease. each looked for an easier triumph, and a result less fundamental and astounding. both read the same bible and pray to the same god, and each invokes his aid against the other. it may seem strange that any men should dare to ask a just inging their bread from the sweat of other men's faces, but let us judge not, that we be not judged. the prayers of both could not be answered. that of neither has been answered fully. the almighty has his own purposes. "woe unto the world because of offenses, for it must needs be that offenses come, but woe to that man by whom the offense cometh" if we shall suppose that american slavery is one of those offenses which, in the providence of god, must needs come, but which, having continued through his appointed time, he now wills to remove, and that he gives to both north and south this terrible war as the woe due to those by whom the offense came, shall we discern therein any departure from those divine attributes which the believers in a living god always ascribe to him? fondly do we hope, fervently do we pray, that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away. yet, if god wills that it continue until all the wealth piled by the bondsman's two hundred and fifty years of unrequited toil shall be sunk, and until every drop of blood drawn with the lash shall be paid by another drawn with the sword, as was said three thousand years ago, so still it must be said "the judgments of the lord are true and righteous altogether." reset next

Plagiarism quiz read both the paragraph below and the information following it that identifies the source using the american psychological association format. then read each of the numbered statements and determine if each is plagiarized or not. circle “yes” if the statement is plagiarized, “no” if it is not, and then fix the “yes” answers). original source the presence of the taiwanese on everest was a matter of grave concern to most of the other expeditions on the mountain. there was a very real fear that the taiwanese would suffer a calamity that would compel other expeditions to come to their aid, risking further lives, to say nothing of jeopardizing the opportunity for other climbers to reach the summit. but the taiwanese were by no means the only group that seemed egregiously unqualified. camped beside us at base camp was a twenty-five-year-old norwegian climber named peter neby, who announced his intention to make a solo ascent of the southwest face, one of the peak’s most dangerous and technically demanding routes—despite the fact that his himalayan experience was limited to two ascents of neighboring island peak, a 20,274-foot bump that required little more than vigorous walking. krakauer, j. (1998). into thin air: a personal account of the mount everest disaster. new york: anchor books, 122 - 3. student samples yes 1. there was a very real fear that the taiwanese would suffer a calamity that would compel other expeditions to come to their aid(krakauer, 1998). no) 2. many climbers overestimate their abilities, as krakauer (1998) explains when he writes of peter neby, whose himalayan experience in the past “required little more than vigorous walking” (122 - 3). no 3. jon krakauer (1998) discusses other concerns besides those of unpredictable weather and his own climbing group’s capabilities. for example the existence of a taiwanese group on everest was a matter of serious unease to most everyone else on the mountain. yes/no 4. krakauer (1998) states that the taiwanese group was not the only inexpert climbers to attempt mt. everest: camped beside us at base camp was a twenty-five-year-old norwegian climber named peter neby. . [whose] himalayan experience was limited to two ascents of neighboring island peak, a 20,274-foot bump that required little more than vigorous walking (122 – 3). yes/no 5. the author asserts that the taiwanese “were by no means the only group that seemed egregiously unqualified.” yes/no 6. in his book into thin air, jon krakauer (1998) discusses many of the dangers he noted prior to his disastrous attempt to climb mt. everest in 1996. among them were encounters with other groups and individual climbers who were ill-trained and ill-equipped to handle the demands of such a climb.

"first of all, how could they mistake a man for a sasquatch? " which best explains the purpose of this question (from review 2)? a) to illustrate how much the book uses humor b) to show how unbelievable parts of the story are c) to convince the reader that the novel is poorly written d) to highlight the differences between the characters in the novel