HERE IS SOME DARK HUMOR ITS SO FUNNY, YOU COULD DIE FOR AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. also write some too Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words ‘antidote' and ‘anecdote,' one of my good friends would still be alive.

I have a joke about trickle down economics. But 99% of you will never get it.

Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. His hunting buddy immediately calls 911. "My friend isn't breathing," he shouts into the phone. "What should I do?" "Relax," the operator tells him. "I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There's silence, and then a gunshot. The guy gets back on the phone and says, "OK, now what?"

“Welcome back to Plastic Surgery Anonymous. Nice to see so many new faces here today!”

"I have good and bad news," the doctor said to his patient. "Give me the good news first," the patient said. "Your test results are back," the doctor said, "and you have only two days to live." "That's the good news?" the patient exclaimed. "What's the bad news?" "I've been trying to reach you for two days."

Which two characteristics are basic parts of a literary analysis essay about a play

How does the author characterize theseus in the story? cite evidence from the text in your response

Read the excerpt from cristina garcia’s dreaming in cuban.i don’t really want to talk about my father but i end up telling minnie how he used to take me horseback riding on our ranch, strapping me in his saddle with a leather seat belt he designed just for me. dad’s family owned casinos in cuba, and had one of the largest ranches on the island. there were beef cattle and dairy cows, horses, pigs, goats, and lambs. dad fed them molasses to fatten them, and gave the chickens corn and sorghum until they laid vermilion eggs, rich with vitamins. he took me on an overnight inspection once. we camped out under a sapodilla tree and listened to the pygmy owls with their old women’s voices. my father knew i understood more than i could say. he told me stories about cuba after columbus came. he said that the spaniards wiped out more indians with smallpox than with muskets.how does the structure of the excerpt add meaning to the passage? it includes historical information about the spaniards and indians to indicate the work is nonfiction.it describes the setting of the ranch owned by pilar’s cuban grandparents to explain family values.it uses several narrators to share their points of view about past and present life in cuba.it manipulates the chronological order of events to reveal the close relationship between pilar and her father.