:)
1. compare the bold sections of both sentences and then answer the question that follows:
original: my father disliked sleet, but my father disliked hail more.
revised: my father disliked sleet, but he hated hail more.
what was done to the bolded section to improve the sentence?
a longer phrase was converted to a single word.
a modifier that did not add meaning was removed.
redundant phrases were eliminated.
repetitive words were replaced with synonyms and pronouns.
2. read the paragraph and answer the question that follows:
the town of belmond, iowa, needs to add weather sirens. the loud and steady wail would warn citizens of approaching danger. if past history is an indication, the sirens will save hundreds of lives. with a prediction of a deadly storm season, the alert system is needed immediately.
which sentence should be revised to eliminate redundancy?
the town of belmond, iowa, needs to add weather sirens.
the loud and steady wail would warn citizens of approaching danger.
if past history is an indication, the sirens will save hundreds of lives.
with a prediction of a deadly storm season, the alert system is needed immediately.
3. read the sentence and answer the question that follows:
in the event that you spy a tornado, go and seek shelter in a dark room that has no windows.
which statement best describes how this sentence can be made more concise.
it has a phrase that can be converted to reduce wordiness.
it has a modifier that may be eliminated because it does not add any meaning.
it has a redundant phrase that may be revised to eliminate repetitiveness.
it has a redundant pair that may be revised to eliminate repetitiveness.