So, today, I was in my lunch break. I wasn't hungry, so I didn't eat anything. I had nothing else to do, so I just sat at my desk, waiting for my Science teacher to start the Zoom Meeting. I was in a quiet room, so I just sat and started thinking, in boredom. Suddenly, I started crying, silently. I was like "why am I crying-", and then it suddenly hit me. I began to remember everything that has happened to me in my past. My mother's passing, my dad's anger issues, my brother's attempt of you know what, my twin sister's toxicity, you know, that stuff. I even ended up crying for an hour and a half. I never realized how bad that was, until now. I didn't realize it before, because I was "used to it." Now, I question if what my dad does is abuse. Verbal abuse. He gets mad when I damage a material thing, which I get, because that stuff costs money. But, he doesn't get mad the way you think. He yells so dang loud. His face goes red too. Not only that, but he called me a failure once, when my grades were failing, at least, that's how I interpreted it. He says that everything is either mine, or my sibling's fault. Whenever I try to defend myself, he usually yells at me to "quit the smart talk" or "stop talking back." I brought my thoughts up to my sister, and she says that "no, it's just strict parenting, tough love, your over-thinking things, stop over-reacting." At this point, I am completely clueless of what's verbal abuse, and what is not. I've been going though this all my life, and I think that I have not had a proper childhood, because of it, but I feel like I need answers. I understand that this platform is not for these things, but I can't find any other platforms that I trust, other then Quora. Can someone tell me if what I'm going through is abuse? I would really appreciate having answers from society, since I have nowhere else to go to.