STAYING CONNECTED IN THESE TOUGH TIMES As it weren't tough enough to stay connected before Cavid 19, It is now way more difficult. We make friends through shared experiences, coffee dates and braais but what happens when we don't have that anymore? Ww've been told to practise social distancing, so now we're keeping our distance and meeling) fewer people, and therefore we're making fewer new connections. For some it has been hard to make connections through a mask and a computer screen. And there's what happens when you mest someone and the two of you just click Jeanie Cave, a clinical psychologist refers to the term dual attunement frame, a kind of synchronicity with someone where you share similar patterns of brain waves - which is much more difficult to achieve when you connect on a virtual platform On the other hand, those of us who have had to rely on strangers such as neighboom ar aoquaintances during the early days of the pandemic now have a whole new support network Only time will tell whether any real friendships have come out of this time, Kattego, a Me coach, says, but I am will to bet that they have. Tough times tend to galvanise people. Jeania and Katlego have a few tips to help find meaningful connections.. Most people are expenencing that same fear of rejection and longing for connection as you an Jeanie says We're all just waiting to make the first move. Remember that you are not alone. life. Katego believes knowing yourself is the first step towards knowing what you want in your life Understand and accept what you like or dislike, the values and standards you expect from a cherished friendship, and why, You don't have to share your whole life story upfront, Jeanie says. But you do need to make yourselt vable and communicate your needs and capacity. Connections are made in give-and take interactions you can't just take Conquer your shame and make yourself visible. Make time for hobbies and interests. It's not just good for your brain-new hobbies and interest are also a fantastic way to reach out over shared excitement or an adventure. A good way to make new friends is to start with your old friends. Reconnect with them. Start off by going through your contacts and start researching there. Look for people with whom you had a connection but never followed through. Drop them a message. There are so many younger people who would thrive given this kind of alliance. The secret is it has to work both ways Younger friends offer a fresh perspective, as does anyone who is different from you. Be open to people who are different in age, race, gender and educational levels. All they need to have in common with you is that they are kind and considerate, like you. When we're in a meaningful relationship, we take turns to show interest Be interested, not interesting. Many people think of making friends as a performance. I have to have something interesting to say. I've got to be impressive in some way. The truth is that people want people in their ves who take an interest in them. SUMMARY ​